Obasanjo Waves A Note! | Independent Newspapers Limited
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COLUMNIST, Conversation of an Angryman

Obasanjo Waves A Note!

Posted: May 18, 2015 at 12:00 am   /   by   /   comments (0)

Okay, you have to hear this in order to disbelieve it. While president-elect, General Mohammadu Buhari, is
waiting for the incumbent president, Dr Goodluck Ebele Jonathan, to prepare and give him his (Jonathan’s) handing over notes, a former president, Chief Olusegun Obasanjo, has already given him some notes on what to do as president of Nigeria. Obasanjo’s epistle to Buhari was submitted on his behalf by the vice chairman of a think tank set up by him four months ago, Dr Kalu Idika Kalu, former minister of finance. It was presented at a brief ceremony at the Buhari Support Organization in Abuja last week to the president-elect.

Obasanjo does not trust that Buhari knows his way around Nigeria or had the presence of mind to map out
strategies on how to rule Nigeria. Bottom line, Obasanjo, like every farmer, is a
cynic. He does not believe that Buhari will fulfill his campaign promises and therefore has come
out with a set of ideas, which reflect what would have been his campaign manifesto if he had run for office in 2015. This was vintage Obasanjo. Lesser mortals like Abdulsalami Abubakar, Yakubu Gowon and Shehu Shagari et al would have considered meeting with Buhari to share ideas – a better approach than the
public presentation of their ideas.

This sounds like a patriotic gesture, right?  It sure should be, if everything was on the square. To put it brusquely, with this unsolicited note, Buhari is between the rock and the hard place. If he accepts everything sent to him by Obasanjo (with the obsequiousness Obasanjo expects), Obasanjo will seek to take the credit and he (Buhari) will sacrifice his campaign promises at the altar of Obasanjo’s perception of reality. If Buhari dares fail to do what His Imperial Majesty Obasanjo’s think tank has told him to do, he should be prepared for an open letter in the next couple of years – a vicious treatise chronicling a piece of Obasanjo’s mind, which
from previous experiences cannot be said to be exactly tainted with holiness.
“Obasanjo has no misgivings about the fact that he created Nigeria,” says Jumbo, my veteran
soldier friend. “His version of the Nigeria creation story should read like this: ‘In the beginning Lord Lugard created Nigeria and Nigeria was without form and void, and I the Almighty Obasanjo said ‘let there be Nigeria and there was Nigeria and I saw that it was good’…. So I left in 1979 and in 1999 I came again… What Lugard did was patch up the country, the way you patch up torn clothes. I, Obasanjo, came and created it. I single-handedly won the Civil War with “My Command” – Gowon was getting married in Lagos and had no hand in it. Everyone who ruled the country before me was simply a forerunner preparing the way for me. All those who have ruled the country after me were idiots who could not think.”
Obasanjo being a very considerate farmer has been thinking for all presidents and heads of state –
just as he thinks for all the livestock in his farm. No farmer can trust animals to behave and conduct themselves well. Remember that Obasanjo is the author of the book, “The Animal Called Man,” and you would know why he finds it difficult to place his faith in men (animals as they are). You cannot blame him, even evolutionists agree that men are descended from apes.
It is a very complicated existence to be a farmer, an ex-soldier, former president and a resource
person for all presidents. OBJ, handsome guy, knows and could swear to it on oath that there
are two sides to every issue in Nigeria – the Obasanjo way and the wrong way. It was out of this grave concern for our great country that he sought for Third Term. Being a very handsome man, as you know, one actually supported him for third term – but Nigerians thought differently. If they had allowed him to go for third term, he would have been serving his fifth term now and Nigeria’s standard of living would have reached Otta Farm level.

I have not forgiven Nigerians since then. I mean Nigerians do not even have the common
sense to recognize that OBJ is a deity and a principality. He is the only president who could look
one of his subjects in the eye and describe him as a “total idiot.” Since he made that statement, the man has not taken any steps to convince Nigerians that he is not an idiot and that Nigeria is not a country of idiots.

He is also the only president who seized a cane from a policeman involved in crowd control and gave the policeman a hiding. Reason? The policeman was overzealous. Something Obama should learn from and give those policemen who keep shooting blacks a lesson in manners.
In his notes, Obasanjo listed five key areas, which he considered in his infallible wisdom to be critical to our national development. These were education, power, economy, security and infrastructure.
For the records, Obasanjo has the right to be concerned about the state of our education – he is the owner of Bell University. For the records again, Bell University was developed after he left office as the president of Nigeria. The morale of the story is that while he was the president of Nigeria, he paid little heed to
education. But time has changed, he now owns a university, he is now a convert and he believes something should be done about education – hopefully starting with Bell. That way Buhari would be taking out an insurance policy against an open letter down the line.

And if we want to kill two birds with one stone, we should add the American University in Nigeria (which is owned by Alhaji Atiku Abubakar) to the mix. What is sauce for the goose should be sauce for the gander, as any good farmer of the experience of Obasanjo would tell you. Atiku may not have submitted his plans to Buhari yet, but one is sure that he is watching Obasanjo and his notes closely. Both were mortal enemies as president and vice president respectively, but lately they have found themselves on the same side of the political fence. There is an ancient Akwa Ibom proverb that a headhunter is usually
suspicious of a man walking behind him with a machete in his hands. Atiku should be concerned.

But we expect more notes and more think tanks. Buhari should collect all of them and do the wise thing – sell them to companies, which recycle papers and raise money for the nation. Then he should go ahead and deliver on his campaign promises. That is what he was voted to do – not to do anybody’s bidding.